Recently, I just feel that I am not independent as I used to be. Independent in some cases which I wish I would be. In some cases I wish I don't need any hand to help.
As an example: I used to go wherever I go by myself, since I lived in a city which I quiet know where to go and how to be there. And vice versa, from the first time I moved to this small town after marriage, of course the habit change. I don't know about this town, so I have no dare to go alone to a certain street. But Alhamdulillaah, Allah bless me with a super extra great husband whom I adore, who will always be ready to accompany and pick me around :D
Then now it was not my main case any longer, coz my husband almost always grant my request as long as he's able to do it for me.
Still stand still, one or two or more cases exist and are responsible for the feeling I own now: Feeling kinda dependent :(
Do you know how bad it is to feel dependent? To do things which we are actually able to do, but we must wait for other person *or people* to accomplish them for us. It's really bittersweet. Bitter bitter but sweet *halah :p
That's why, in my era of being a
great student, when I got some tasks from my teacher or lecturer, I myself prefer individual work to group work. Doesn't mean I couldn't work in a team. But more like I am kind of woman who has less trust to some people in doing things which I thought I could do myself *winkwink*
Well yeah. The point is: if I can be much more satisfied and 'allayed' of the works I do, then why I should I depend others to do that? :D
The only answer of mine is: Because I have enough respect to share. That's it :)