Ah, my best friends…
I know how much you love me in this earth. I know how sorry you were seeing me falling down in my metamorprocess, then reflecting your feeling of worry by telling me directly right in front of my face, but in your very own sentences which I understand but can’t comprehend. Why didn’t I comprehend, and had no intention to? Ha!! What for, friends? No use! Since it’s you who started to light the flame up to me.
Then now, when you have already played your part, turned me into different me, again you show your very PERFECT AFFECTION, though, again and again, the way is totally not in line with what I expect.
I am always giving my standing applause for this! Thanks, friends. But things to know, it’s just too late to tell, coz my heart is hurt of a lie, eventhough it was a white lie. Just for your information, friends. I don’t care what the color of your lie is! Even if it were pink, I still don’t care!
Well, my friends. I know you do really know me well. I know you know with what kind of woman you are having problem with. Now let me question on you: Is it an obligation for me to tell you the detail about my way to change much better? Don’t you wanna see me happy in my trace, walking slowly but sure again, to reach what we wanna own together? Yes, I realize we are friends. I do realize you always love me for the good and the bad things of mine.
But, I am so much sorry, friends. I do really apologize to remark this. If you start coming too deeply into my privacy that much, then you think you are trying to save me, and the right line *you think so* from that so-called taboo thing *ah, it’s in your mind* while you have no idea on how much I need my way to stay, means you actually don’t really know me, and don’t really love me.
One thing for sure and I know you know this: I’d rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I am not!
So, if you have no power yet to see me this way in very wonderful metamorprocess, I beg you to go to library, then try to look for some literatures about how to love your best friend *only if you think I am, of course* in perfect way. Because you know me friends, I am not perfect. Olrait. Anyway, I love you, really. So much, friends. And sure, in my perfect way.
Still don’t understand those all, friends? Ah well, then. One more other thing. Saya sampaikan, barangkali kalian perlu saya kabari langsung di sini, bahwa saya sedang implementasikan sebuah pesan singkat yang dikirim pada tanggal 13 Februari 2008 dari seorang kakak yang saya sayangi. Pesan kakak saat itu adalah agar saya belajar dari 2 Umar, yaitu Umar bin Khattab dan Umar bin Abdul Azis, bertahap melakukan perubahan.
Nah, mengenai tahapannya, kawan, saya mohon kalian tsiqoh pada saya ya. Karena kalian pun sudah setuju kan, bahwa tahap setiap orang berbeda, dengan cara berbeda pula.
Once again, I love you, friends...
Ini tulisan saya pada tanggal 15 April 2009 yang tersimpan dalam folder draft. Egois dan emosional banget yah kesannya hihihi :p. Tulisan ini sempat saya terbitkan, sempat dikomentari, kemudian saya simpan sebagai draft. Sekarang, saya terbitkan lagi :D
Yaaah, inilah yang saya sebut sebagai: the way I was, am, and will :)
Everybody's changing, rite?